Monthly Archives: September 2012

Recipe: Chocolate Peanut Butter Cake

Chocolate cake frosted with peanut butter frosting and homemade peanut clusters.

I KNOW!

Chocolate Peanut Butter Cake with Homemade Peanut Clusters

Ingredients:

1 package chocolate cake mix
1 cup cold milk
1 package chocolate instant pudding mix (4 serving size)
1/2 cup peanut butter
1/2 cup peanuts
2 squares semi-sweet baking chocolate
1 container whipped topping

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Prepare and bake cake according to package. Use two 9 inch round cake pans. Cool a few minutes and then remove from pans. Let cool completely.

Mix together milk and pudding mix. Beat until well blended. Add peanut butter and mix well.

Trim cake tops if needed to make them flat. Place one of the cake layers on a serving platter. Spread one cup of the peanut butter mixture over the top. Place second cake layer on top. Stir whipped topping into remaining peanut butter mixture. Spread over top and sides of cake.

Melt the chocolate squares. Mix with peanuts. Drop by spoonfuls onto a waxed paper covered tray. Refrigerate until firm. Place on top of cake before serving.

This cake is so delicious you won’t believe your mouth!

Enjoy!

A Picture Day Miracle

Charlie put on jeans and a button up shirt for picture day on his own. Like, he decided to wear it.

Yes, this is a monumental moment. Since this day years ago, what Charlie wears has always been one of those parenting struggles I avoid at all cost.

He came down the stairs and I was shocked. You know how you don’t want to startle a squirrel? So you just stand there and pretend you don’t see it while looking out of the corner of your eye? Don’t move, don’t say anything, don’t frighten him away lest he scurry back upstairs and change into sweat pants and a mismatched t-shirt.

I just stood there. “Good morning.” Not too cheery, not to mundane. Just right. You see, if he thinks I’m too cheery, he will know that I noticed his attire. If I say it too mundane, he will think I didn’t notice at all.

Walk on egg shells, much?

“Is this ok for picture day?!” he asked proudly. This was my invitation to encourage him on his good choice. The wind was blowing in just the right direction. “I think that’s an excellent choice! I love it!” I reply with a smile.

“I thought you would.” he says, rather smugly, but with a smirk.

WAIT. He thought of me? He thought about what I might want him to wear on picture day? What is this thing? What is happening?

My well-dressed-child-without-a fight dreams are coming true. But I won’t hold my breath. Next weekend we have a family wedding to attend. And God only knows which direction the wind will be blowing on that day.

For now, I’ll give my adorably dressed squirrel a hug before he scurries away. Or bites me.

And no, I do not have a picture. Are you kidding me? Rule number one around skiddish squirrels on picture day, no flash photography. Does that sentence even make sense? Of course not. Parenting rarely does.

Recipes: Egg Muffins & Breakfast Sandwiches

In an effort to stay off the cereal bandwagon I have attempted a few new breakfast ideas. With school mornings being hectic, there is little to no time to make a full breakfast. Here are the ways I’ve been able to take breakfast back!

Breakfast Sandwiches:

This isn’t a recipe as much as it is an idea. It’s pretty simple, don’t be too impressed. I use bagels or English muffins (depending on what was on sale at the store last week!) or I make homemade biscuits. I then scramble a whole lotta eggs. I sometimes use sausage patties. I always use cheese. Always. I then layer the goodies all together and stick in the freezer.

I am on the hunt for reusable containers that are just the right size so I don’t have to use baggies.

In the morning, just stick the sandwich in the microwave! We usually split them in half and nuke for a couple of minutes. I think a toaster oven would give the best results, but we don’t have one. So. Microwave.

It’s a great quick breakfast option and way cheaper and healthier than the fast food or store bought versions! Give it a try and let me know if you find any better ways of making them!

Egg Muffins:

I found this idea on Pinterest, of course! The recipe is from Kalyn’s Kitchen. It’s basically any fillings you want covered in eggs and baked. I did a southwestern version with green chiles, cheese, and salsa. I also did a standard sausage and cheese version. The boys pop these in the microwave and have with a slice of whole wheat toast. Love this option! Eggs in the morning without cooking them in the morning!

What quick, innovative breakfast ideas have inspired you to get off the cereal bandwagon?

It’s All Relative

When I wrote a post about my husband’s upcoming deployment I had quite a few responses. The ones that stood out to me the most were the ones from fellow moms who spoke out of guilt. It sounded something like this:

“I complain about my husband being gone one night or one weekend. I can’t imagine what six months would look like,” said with an apologetic tone.

So it got me thinking about this subject of guilt and judgement. I’ve talked about this before and obviously it’s something I am supposed to be learning right now. So since you are reading my blog, you are forced to as well. You’re welcome!

Here’s the thing I am learning, our struggles are all relative to where we are at in our lives.

Whether it’s about your weight, parenting, your marriage…whatever…it’s all relative.

I am battling with what I will do when my husband is gone for six months. But that does not in any way make your battle with your husband being gone a weekend any smaller. It’s all relative to our situation.

This is my journey. These are my stories. You have different ones. And that’s ok.

It’s ok that I am a size 8 and struggling with my weight and you are a size 12 and struggling with yours. Because it’s all relative to where we are at in our lives. I wrote “Stop Telling Me I’m Not Fat” out of this same mind set. I almost didn’t because, what if people with really bad weight problems get their feelings hurt?! (And they did, sorry!) But I let that go. Just because we vary in sizes doesn’t mean that one struggle is worse than the other. A struggle is a struggle. Right? (Serious health issues, aside, obviously! I’m talking about “I don’t like my butt” weight issues, here.)

It’s ok that I am parenting the way I do and you are parenting the way you do. We are not the same people. My struggles and yours in our parenting are all relative to the kinds of kids we have and our family dynamics. I am not right. You are not wrong.

We react based out of that fear.

 “Oh, she deals with her husband deploying for months at a time, I better not complain about my husband working late.”

“Oh well she has 30 pounds to lose and I only have 10 so I better not mention my weight issues.”

“Oh she has perfect angel children, if I tell her the truth about my wild maniacs she will think I am a terrible parent.” (This is usually what I am thinking.)

Stop that! If it’s hard on you, then that’s ok! Talk about it! Don’t hold it in in fear of judgement from someone going through something harder or different. We all go through different things at different times. Why do we allow ourselves to feel badly for where we are at in our lives?

Sure, some people have it worse off than us. And it is good to stop and be grateful. I am not suggesting that we be rude and say, “Oh yeah, look at what I am going through!” I am simply suggesting that when someone presents their struggle to you, you respond with the understanding that they are in a different place than you. They live a different life. Don’t compare them to yourself. Don’t compare yourself to them. We all handle things differently.

Let’s work on this, ok? Let’s support each other with what we are struggling with without harsh judgement. Let’s agree to disagree on various subjects and realize that we are all in this together. Let’s support one another and realize that it’s all relative. I’m not right. You are not wrong. And vice-versa. I am struggling with something that seems so, so big to me…and so are you!

I hope my rambled thoughts make sense to you.

 The bottom line, I don’t want anyone to feel like their problems and feelings are insignificant.

No matter how big or how small. It counts. It matters. Give yourself a break. Because I sure am!

Thirty Five

A long time ago in a galaxy far far away, I was born.

I started out as this adorable little creature…

But quickly grew into this…

And things started getting really good when I became this…

And now, here I am, at 35 years old.

As this.

And I can’t imagine being anything else in the world.
Happy Birthday, self. And might I add, you look pretty good for 35.

Excuse the bad photos, I snapped them straight out of scrapbooks with my phone. Lazy. Shut up it’s my birthday.

You Think I’m Strong But I’m Not So Sure

We are a military family. It is fairly new to us. Even though many of our family members have been in the military, Matt just joined about three (or four? is it bad I can’t remember?) years ago. So it’s new to us on the level where it affects our every day life.

The longest Matt has been away is for six weeks for Officer Training School. I was so relieved that he could skip the eight week basic training and go straight into Officer School. Those two weeks seemed to make it so much shorter, although, it’s just two weeks, right? Here’s the thing…I cried every single day of those six weeks. Every. Single. Day. I missed him. I was never so aware of how much I needed him. I hated it. He has left for many small trainings and trips since then. A week here and there. And I cry every time he leaves.

Now here we are staring down the face of a six month deployment. While I realize that a six month tour is super short by military terms, it is our first deployment and it sounds like six years to my heart.

And I have already been told that I should not complain about six months because it’s nothing and other husbands are gone way longer but I find that to be totally rude and I can be upset if I want to, so there. 

Anyway.

I am heading up the Family Readiness Group for Matt’s squadron so I had a meeting with the commanders the other day. One of them says, “We still have __ (amount of months removed for privacy purposes) months until the deployment so the families are not really thinking about it yet.” And I just about started crying right there. (But I didn’t because I had my super professional no crying hat on.) No one was thinking about it yet? I am thinking about it every day and totally freaking out. Why are other people not?! Am I that much of a disaster/failure of a military wife? Now, to be fair, this is a man talking and generally speaking they don’t get how our minds work. So he could have been totally thinking like a man. Maybe the other wives are thinking about it. I’m sure I’ll find out soon.

When I discuss these OMG feelings with others, I am told things like:

“You are stronger than you think you are.”

“You have been through so much, you can handle this!”

And so on.

But I don’t always believe those statements about myself. You didn’t see me curled up crying every day of those six weeks. You didn’t see me cry on the side of the road on the way to getting the car fixed last week because what will I do when the car needs work and I don’t know if the mechanics are telling me the truth and I can’t just pick up on the phone and call him next time. You didn’t see me cry at the end of the driveway yesterday because the garbage can was super heavy and what will I do when he is gone and things are heavy?

I know what I will do when those things happen while he is gone. I will call the male friends we have that know about cars. I will summon my supermom powers and lift the heavy things. Or buy a crane. I know I will just do it. Because I won’t have a choice.

My husband reminds me that our sacrifices matter. It’s bigger than us. And I totally agree. I do not regret that we decided to be a military family. I take a deep breath and remind myself of that in those OMG moments. I remind myself that women do this every day. They do it well. They do it for many, many more months than I will have to. And I can do it too. I just need to trust in myself and the people around me who will be my support. I need to remember that I am not alone. Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. I will not be alone.

But without him by my side…physically…by my side. My heart doesn’t believe you when you tell me that I am strong. My heart screams, “NO I AM NOT! SHUT UP AND LET ME CRY LILE THE BIG WHINEY BABY THAT I AM.” (Yes, my heart talks in all caps.)

So I am left thinking. Am I really strong? Is the me you see in regular life, smiling and carrying on as if nothing is wrong, the strong me? Or is the me crying by the side of the road, admitting that I am weak, the strong me? Is it both? Is it that I can admit all of this to the internet, is that the strong me? What makes you think that I am so strong? What makes me think that I am not?

You think I’m strong but I’m not so sure. I suppose we are all about to find out. I hope I prove you right. For my sake. For my kids’ sake. I sure hope you are right about me. For once in my life, I sure hope I am wrong.